If you know me, you know that I love school! I love it so much that I thought the best thing for me to do was to apply to get a PhD. Last year, I watched people celebrate their PhD acceptances and while I was certainly happy for them, I had to deal with the total opposite--REJECTIONS! Although I applied to two PhD programs in 2018 with hopes of being accepted for Fall 2019, I got denied from both.

I got my “little” rejection emails, ate my disappointment through some Outback and a Wallaby-Darned and decided that life must go on.

My philosophy on life is to take risks and WHEN (not if) I fail, not to beat myself up, but as the old folks say, "take a lickin and keep on tickin." While I’m okay with failing, getting rejected and things not working as planned, I am certainly not okay with giving up. I strongly believe that one person, one man or one program does not stop a show. My faith in God and my belief in myself isn’t built like that.

Faith is not the belief that God will do what you want. It is the belief that God will do what is right. – Max Lucado

When I first got rejected, I was too embarrassed to tell anyone, especially my professors who always had high expectations of me. I was afraid that I was going to let them down with my bad news. However, all of their responses were exactly the opposite.

When I called my undergrad research mentor and told him that I didn’t get accepted, he invited me to his house. Assured me that everything was going to be okay and worked with me to talk about how to make the best of my “gap year.” He had faith in me.

When I called my former supervisor at the Ronald Walters Public Policy Center, she told me not to worry about anything. We talked for over an hour about places I should apply to next cycle and even followed up our conversation by putting me in contact with some of her colleagues via Twitter who were more than willing to help me. She had faith in me.

When I called my former professor, big-sister-like mentor, she scheduled a call with me and homegirl gave me a step-by-step manual of things that I should do, including evaluating my own application materials and reaching out to professors whose work I was interested in. She had faith in me.

Mentors are important because they have faith in you and see your potential even when you can't see it. I stand on their shoulders. I wouldn’t be the person I am without their guidance.

I reached out to every single professor at each of the universities I wanted to attend, introduced myself, and asked to set up a phone call. During these calls, I told them about my future goals and plans, the work that I’ve done and asked how I could be most competitive on my application for the following year. I took notes by hand during every single call and compiled their answers in a spreadsheet.

I wrote multiple drafts of my personal statement and sent them to my mentor. When she told me a draft was trash, I deleted it and went back to the drawing board. By the time I wrote my final draft, it was perfect.

While I had already taken the GRE before, my scores were average. I knew that this time I couldn’t accept just accept a mediocre score. I spent my lunch break and evenings after work studying hard and doing practice problems over and over again. While my numerical value didn’t increase much, I scored in the 92nd percentile with my analytical writing and that’s huge! Things were really starting to look up.

I spent long nights and plenty weekends at my dining room table working on applications and diversity statements. I went to work, came home, made dinner, brewed coffee and spent several hours reading, writing and re-reading and re-writing. I wanted my applications to be PERFECT!

If you want something bad enough, you’ll work for it.

I submitted all of my applications on December 15th and before submitting, said a brief prayer with each one, trusting that God would have his way. After submission, I got some much needed rest and moved on to the next goal.

In January, my pastor said that the theme this year was, “Expecting Plenty in 2020!" I too, adopted the theme for my own life and did just that. I took a pic and posted it on Facebook with a similar caption.

I was expecting plenty, but not the plenty that God blessed me with. As of today, I have received SEVEN, FULLY FUNDED PhD ACCEPTANCES. S-E-V-E-N. 7. SIETE. Not only are these institutions offering to pay my tuition for five years, they are also paying me stipends to come there.

Disappointments are just God’s way of saying “I have got something better”, be patient, have faith, trust God.

And you know what one of those schools is, UofSC, the same school that sent me my first rejection later. And you know who declined their offer to go to an institution with a better offer? ME! Remember, the tables always turn!

I am reminded of the quote, Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” – Isaiah 41:10

So I’m not sure exactly where I’m going as of yet, but I do know I deserve these acceptances.

Every. Single. One.

I prayed for these acceptances & even though I feel like a high school recruit, I worked my ass off for this moment. I am unstoppable when it comes to my dreams and you should be too. If things don’t work in your favor the first time, really think about you and your actions. If I'm being completely honest, I was just as qualified last year as I was this year. But on the bright side of things, while I was settling with only two schools last year, I have seven to choose from this year!

Remember His timing, not yours!

Take a step back, do some evaluation over your life, talk & solicit advice from people you trust & be honest with yourself. If I’m honest, my first applications sucked, but the ones from this previous application cycle? Put me up to anybody & I’m betting on me! You should bet on you!

Peace. Love. Rosé.